yes. break.

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shooting a special cake...

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big scarf in steven alan home

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pretty light in steven alan brooklyn

it's been a great week; a very relaxing, rewarding week. and it feels so great.

after christmas day, i began to shoot some new recipes i've come up with (and they're really, realllllly goooood, if i do say so myself). i think what's really great about writing recipes is that once you get an end result (hopefully positive), it's gratifying. i've been feeling a lot of that this winter break. plus, i get to eat all of my dishes, so that's nice too.

it's also been great to spend more time with my mom, dad, and brother; to be able to go out shopping or just talk during the day. i also get to cook with my mom again; that feels nice. everything that has to do with free time is nice. free time is nice. watching an entire harry potter marathon is nice. sleeping in is nice. 

break is nice.

oh god, i'm going to have a lot of trouble when school starts again.

enough of my crazy rambling. have a great week everyone!

the tree

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personally, the merry holiday feelings do not begin until my family and i pick a christmas tree. in this sentence i effectively used diction; from the use of the word 'pick', we can extrapolate that izzy selectively chooses her trees, meaning that she rejects all other trees until she finds the perfect one. we once again witness the human condition to strive for perfection, even if that means hurting the feelings of poor trees in the process. 

BAM. english analysis studying done. QED. oh look, geometry studying done, too. 

this week is crammed with before-break tests, quizzes, and assessments– too many? never... but it's overwhelming at times. during my study sessions and work periods, i enjoy listening to covers of classic holiday songs and ballads to keep reminding myself that the winter break is near.

as i was saying before i went into my tree analysis, today we drove upstate to select the perfect arboreal figure. now in the Rael family, there's a lot that goes into consideration when choosing a tree: its height, its color, its fullness, its ability to fit in the stairwell, its scent, and other beneficial factors. we ended up deciding on a full, 11-foot tree with green pine needles and a blue-grey underside, while also having an extremely prominent pine-y smell. i say it's perfect. truly perfect. it's pretty bare at the moment, but it will be filled with ornaments by tomorrow morning.

let the holidays begin.

have a lovely sunday, everyone. 

p.s. below is the playlist that i listen to during the holidays. enjoy.

p.p.s. happy last consecutive date of the century.

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to be thankful

today is the day of turkeys, of cranberries, of sweet potatoes, and of gravy. yes, for some, this day might be all about food and its preparation, but really there's another meaning behind it.

i don't really mean celebrating the 'first thanksgiving' where the pilgrims hosted a thanksgiving meal for local native americans, maybe for some of you this might be the case. i'm talking more about the 'thanks' in thanksgiving– the way we celebrate it in our household today.

for my family, thanksgiving is a time to reconvene with other parts of family that we don't get to see often. today we reflect on how thankful we are to be able to spend time with extended family, and realizing we have so many possessions and opportunities to be thankful for.

especially in our high-tech and plugged-in world, these notions can be so easily tossed aside and overlooked; even though it is these things that are the most important when celebrating thanksgiving day. 

personally, i am thankful for a lot of things that i often take for granted. 

i am thankful for:

having a home and a loving, supportive family

being able to attend school in a safe environment

the food that is not always so readily available for others

the opportunities that have opened doors for me

living in an appreciative community

my education

having caring friends

really the list could go on and on.

so tonight, or whenever you have a chance to, reflect on what you are thankful for; be appreciative of what you have, remember the importance and message behind thanksgiving, and eat your sweet potatoes. 

have a lovely thanksgiving everyone!

p.s. this is my favorite part of the charlie brown thanksgiving movie. enjoy.

stress & friday links

let's talk about stress. 

as a freshman at a completely new school that is also completely unfamiliar, i have a lot of stress. stress = little sleep = anxiety about not sleeping = being unconfident about stuff. so therefore, using the transitive property, stress = not being confident about stuff.

i think that what's hard for me to fully understand is that struggling is part of being a teenager. that being uncomfortable when you don't grasp a concept or when you are around other people is normal.

although i am writing these statements now, i realize that even i haven't comprehended them yet. which kind of sucks, but i think i'm getting used to it. 

to all my fellow students: you will make it through. 

to all of my fellow non-students: you will make it through.

to myself: just stop freaking out.

okay. just had to put that out there.

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on a much happier note, here my friday links for this week. 

1/ this kale + squash salad is definitely going on my "have-to-make-this-now" list

2/ i've never heard of a bostock before... but i think i need one. or four.

3/ can we all just agree that this can easily be the greatest flour shot of all time?

4/ i think this is very relevant. plus, ruby is one of my favorite cartoonists...

5/ can we just appreciate the fact that the newsroom season 3 is premiering next month (!!!!!!!!!! internally screaming !!!!!!!!!!)

6/ i think i am in love with the coloring of this movie

have a lovely weekend everyone.

FIFTEEN! + pumpkin muffins

it's kind of hard for me to believe that i'm turning fifteen today.

the big 1-5– the year of the quinceanera (that i am not having).

i mean, it's just another year that i've been alive, in a quite literal sense. 

about 6 hours into fifteen-dom i realize that being fifteen is just like being fourteen. it's not like you're turning thirteen, your first "teen" year; or eighteen, your last "teen" year; and you're not celebrating your sweet sixteen, either. so i ask, what is it then?

fifteen. just fifteen. 

so instead of saying fourteen you say fifteen. that's basically it. you say you're fifteen and that you're a freshman in high school. that's all that you think has changed.

physically.

i don't feel different, i don't look different, i don't sound different, i don't know any different, but i know that i have changed, and will continue to change. and yes, that is both a good thing and a bad thing.

good in the sense that i am becoming more knowledgable, and that there will be more opportunities for me.

bad in the sense that i am actually getting older; physically and mentally, and that i will have to hold more responsibility on my shoulders. but there's no stopping it. there's no stopping any of it. and i have to deal with it.

so to this i say, happy birthday, me.

may this sixteenth year of existence bring you good things.

have a wonderful friday, everyone.

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(izzy's birthday) pumpkin muffins

makes 12

1.5c spelt flour

1 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp chinese five spice

1 tsp freshly ground nutmeg

1/2 tsp ground anise

1 (15-oz) can pumpkin puree

1/2c plain greek yogurt (i used 0%)

1 flax egg or egg

3/4c coconut sugar

optional: 1/4c pumpkin seeds + turbinado sugar

01/ preheat oven to 350 degrees F and spray a 12 muffin tin with canola oil

02/ in a medium bowl, sift spelt flour and combine with baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, five spice, nutmeg, and anise

03/ in a separate, larger bowl, combine pumpkin puree, yogurt, egg, and coconut sugar. make sure it is thoroughly mixed

04/ pour dry ingredients into the wet ingredients

05/ with a spatula, carefully fold ingredients together until just combined. make sure not to over-mix because then the muffins will be dense!

06/ using a ice cream scooper or large spoon, scoop the muffin mixture into individual muffin tins

07/ sprinkle each one with a pinch of pumpkin seeds, and a generous smidgen of turbinado sugar

08/ bake for 22-30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean when entered in the center of the muffin

09/ let cool, then gobble down

autumn

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*click on the photographs to view larger

when you come to the realization that today is the first day of fall, it kind of just hits you. i mean, weren't we just in summer yesterday? weren't we still in the warm weather with the grilled peaches, corn on a cob, and hot breezes?

where did it all go?

it's not like i miss it with all my heart or anything. yeah, i do miss all the stone fruits, and the fact that i don't have to wear a coat, but there's just something so cozy and good-feelings-y about autumn. tea. pumpkins. squashes. chilly weather. big duvets. long pajamas. new wool hats. TEA.

all of my friends say they miss summer. i've missed fall. 

moving on...

it's been 2-ish weeks as a high-schooler. i feel these subtle changes arising. with age comes responsibility, but at the same time new opportunities. the other thing that comes with responsibility is homework. and no, no, i'm not complaining and/or ranting about homework. i'm just saying that the quantity of the (horrid) stuff is greater than it was last year. i have less time to really do the things that i love (i.e. recipe-making, shooting the recipes, posting the recipes, having more content for the blog, etc.) 

it's a pang in the heart, really.

in fact, i started writing this post at about 5:21ish in the morning. it's 5:52am, now. 

happy first day of autumn, everyone. 

hello? + links/photographs of my week

one the many problems of being a part time blogger is... *sad and weak drumroll*... figuring out what to write about. i guess that's why a lot of people do friday links, or color-coded moodboards, or interior posts... (*coughcough* me *coughcough*). 

i think what the point i'm trying to get at, here, is that curating for a blog is not easy. it's especially hard when you're also a full-time student. the thing about blogging (in its entirety) is that you're trying to post what you would read, yourself, while thinking about what your readers would want read, too. difficult, isn't it? you probably don't want to hear me blab on about this "ya gotta stay committed" sort of stuff, but i'm not listening!

i realize that being completely and utterly honest, and sharing that with your audience, is what makes the blog interesting because there's so much stuff about the writer and there's so much other stuff about stuff and there's so much writing and photos and information and jumbles of words and you just can't stop writing and there's just so much to do and there's so much to say and show and tell! but you can't. and when you try to blog, you get blogger's block. it happens. it actually happens to me every time i carve out some time to write here. and it sucks. but you know what? i think, and it usually comes to me, anyways. 

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1/ molly's funfetti cake from scratch is actually fabulous... does homemade mean healthy? i think so.

2/ really want to try this (vegan) farro salad with cashew cheese. have yet to make cashew cheese... maybe this is clear sign to do so.

3/ this tumblr post made me bawl. tell me if you get it.

4/ frank ocean though. 

5/ did someone say pumpkin spice latté? 

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have a wonderful wednesday, everyone.

transitions + high school

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yes, i am at school right now. yes, i did throw this type sort-of thing together in about 5 minutes. no, i'm not not busy at the moment. no, stop. i am a high schooler. yes, high school. high. school. 

it's my second day as a ninth grader. a high schooler, officially. (a high schooler with pretty rad friends, i might add). i never thought that i'd become who i am today. and what's absolutely crazy is that i have no idea who i'll be next year, or the year after that, or the year after the year after that.  i try not to think about it really, i just want things to happen the way they happen. (i'm not trying to sound the least bit deep or anything)... 

as a 14 (almost 15!) year-old middle school graduate, i realized something. i realized that i have accomplished so many fantastic, wonderful, astonishing, and mind-blowing things in the mere 15 years of my very existence. whoever is reading this now, just think of all of the great things that you have done too! i mean really. if you're 34, 19, 12, i don't care, just think. how did you accomplish those things? did you achieve these moments because you were afraid to take risks, step out of your boundaries, and assure yourself that you can do absolutely nothing?

NO!

of course not! who does that? who does any of that at all? recognize that you've done these marvelous things and gone to such an extent because you were NOT afraid to take risks, step out of your boundaries, and you were able to assure yourself that you can do absolutely EVERYTHING.

remember these three things:

1. there are no such thing as failures– only learning opportunities.
2. everyone struggles, you are not alone.
3. and don't take life too seriously.

even i have to think back to these three simple notes.

read them over and over, i promise they will get you through a lot if you remember them. 

on a simpler note, have a great weekend everyone. 

it's over

(roll mouse over image above!)

i was walking home from school yesterday, and i thought, "wow, this is really the end."

and it truly is the end... of middle school.

and although it is only the end of yet another school year, i started to reflect what great things have happened this year. the many awesome things.

• i turned fourteen 
• i attended an amazing school
• i learned more than i have ever thought possible
• i successfully got into a high school
• i rediscovered my love for art and drawing
• i started to read again
• i started this blog
• i started to cook
• i started to bake
• i started to write
• i started taking photographs 
• i became comfortable with aloneness 

i have learned a tremendous amount this year. many of which are not noted on the beginning of this already long list. it could go on. 

i can admit i have very much changed since the beginning of the year. and i am thankful for the people who have helped shape me into the young woman i am now.

to my parents, teachers, peers, and others, i want to thank you all.

i cannot wait for the amazing changes of next year. i can already see great things.

summer has finally begun.